How about a little Q & A to spice things up a bit??

Question...

OK so a situation JUST occurred (while i was writing this email) and I do not know how to handle it. So a friend of mine always says she wants to get closer with God but the fruits aren't there. We've had long talks about modesty and random things I've learned over the years. Now with prom coming up, she's been asked by a few guys. They all party. I told her she should tell the guys she would not want to attend a drinking party. She told me she had nothing against it as long as she didn't drink. I tried explaining to her that it's not that she's a "bad person" if she went, but it wasn't doing anything for her to "stand out" for Christ. As I tried to explain, she just kept telling me "WHY DO YOU THINK I WOULD DRINK?" She was hearing what she wanted to hear. I was trying to explain to her I did not think she was a bad person if she went to the party, but it wasn't "standing out" by any means for Christ. I wanted her to know she could do whatever she wanted, but I also want her to know the alternative. She took it as nothing but an insult. We talk about everything so it wasn't out of the orient for me to talk to her. I don't want to come on too strong, but I don't want her walking luke warm and thinking all is alright either. If she died the next day and things weren't ok, and I didn't say ANYTHING to her, I couldn't live with that. (p.s. she's justifying that her parents are ok with everything as long as she doesn't drink... i pointed out she's not 21 and if the cops showed up she wouldn't just be chillin there even tho she wasn't drinking.) if you have any advice to offer please do help me.
As far as stuff with your friend goes…this is what I would do!

Answer...

1. Ask her who she is living for…she’s either living for
a.) herself
b.) the Lord

There are so many things that factor into living for the Lord.

1. If we call our selves “Christian” people are watching us! They are watching to see if we are who we say we really are. We in and of ourselves...in our actions, words, etc are a vision of the gospel and the kingdom of God. Like it or not…we live in a fishbowl. So, she’s got to ask herself…”am I showing Christ to the world by my actions?”

2. As Christians we are called to be bondservants. A bondservant is someone who is a slave by choice. This person has chosen to give up their rights and live as the Master has asked them to live. This is a loving thing…because we love Him so much, we give up anything we would call ours to live for Him….we also take on His identity. Taking on His identity goes with #1…what kind of identity are we giving Christ with the lives we live?

3. She needs to ask herself if she’s truly been transformed by Christ. I honestly believe that the majority of “Christians” don’t know ALL that Christ did for them. I know I sure didn’t…I probably still don’t. Doing the Worship study even opened up a whole new appreciation for what He has done…and has TRANSFORMED the way I live my life. If we truly grasp what it all meant for us…we will live changed lives! We will realize that Christ is enough for us…we will see that living 100% for Him is our only option…it’s the least we can do for ALL he has done for us.

I guess in saying all of that I would ask her the question above. “Who are you living for?” If she says the Jesus then ask her how others can see that? Ask her to give you examples…this will probably be really hard for her to answer…but, it will at least make her think! Then, just remind her that even though she doesn’t like it sometimes…people are watching her to get a picture of what true Christianity is. Remind her that she has a responsibility to represent Him WELL! Remind her of what Christ did for her…and ask her that if it truly makes any difference in her life…because it should make her want to bow down before Him and worship Him.

Then, let it go! After saying all of this you will just have to let her go and do whatever it is she’s going to do. We can only say so much…the Lord has to do the rest. In letting it go…you still need to pray constantly for her…but, you can’t keep badgering her on every decision she makes. She will make her decisions based on what she is allowing the Lord to do in her life. You want her to make decisions because it’s what she knows she wants to do between her and God…not just because her weird Christian friend said so!

It’s so easy to try to make people conform to the truth. I mean we see it…and we want them to live in it too. But we have to be careful to not be the Holy Spirit in people’s lives. God needs to convict them! We don’t need to fix them! (I’m pretty sure you know this…just a reminder).

Anyway, after saying all of this to your friend…you need to remember that you now have a high standard to keep…and You need to live Christ out in front of her DAILY. We have been studying Daniel lately. Chapter 6 was so convicting to me! It’s the story of Daniel and the Lion’s Den. I remember the story as a kid…but it REALLY impacted me this year! I was going to type out the whole story…but figured you could read it for yourself! You really should!! J Pay close attention to verse 4, 5, & 22. We need to live lives like Daniel…when people try to find stuff wrong with us they can’t because we live our lives according to the Word of God! It’s not easy…trust me I KNOW. I’m going through a REALLY tough situation right now because I’ve had to make some hard decisions on stuff that doesn’t feel good…but, I know I did what was right…and people can’t look at me and say…oh Brooke, well, she’s cool but………..I want people to look at me and see Christ ALL OVER me! I know you want the same for yourself! But, your friend, might (I don’t know if she will), try to find something about you to point out…you need to be ready to answer that…and live your life 100% for Him!